The Rapacious

My eyes
can see the dark
and hidden places where
they meet to steal the wealth beneath
our feet, contaminate the air we breathe.
They play a propaganda game,
extolling wealth that will
be gained as they
disguise
the threat they pose
to water, air, and land.
Distracting us with techno toys
as they position mean machines that tear
the gas and oil from mile deep rocks.
Those profits will enrich
the haughty few
with lives
of Gatsby wealth
insured by covert schemes
while taking it away from those
who need it most. They’re drilling deep below
our homes, releasing side effects –
disease and parasites.
Cabals control
by lies,
denying deeds;
their greed extracts great tolls
on earth and all who dwell thereon.
What they forget is even wealth will not
protect them from the ravages
that they’ve unleashed. They too
may face what they
devised.

© Gay Reiser Cannon * 4.8.2014

in response to the form I composed and named “Falling Diamonds”  or the “Quarrel” (so named for a quarrel window – made of diamond shaped window panes).

It is composed of a series of lines beginning with one line of one iambic foot, then two, three, four, five, four, three, two iambic feet and then again one iambic foot where the one foot lines must rhyme. Basically then the form is blank verse that is shaped in diamonds or triangles with one sustaining middle rhyme. You may choose to add either internal or end rhymes as well but the only requirement is for the one foot lines to rhyme. Hyphenating end words is prohibited. A minimum of two diamonds should be made.

It occurs to me (after having written this poem) that an interesting use of the form would be to devote each diamond to one viewpoint and the next to the opposing viewpoint, a debate, a true quarrel.

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43 thoughts on “The Rapacious

  1. ah, so true on how the cabals control…and drill our future out of the ground…robbing the world, controlling the wealth…we are little better, dependent on the oil like addicts…falling diamonds….nice…i like the name of your form…oo the feet might confuse me a bit…lol…tripping over my own…smiles.

    • Thanks Brian. Funny the idea of the poem came with the form. I had no idea what I would do when I decided to go for this topic, but I thought “what I need is more forms to talk about”…and went from there. Ha.

  2. very cool form…especially visually. I like your idea of opposing viewpoints,,,especially if the ending iamb could serve as both the last word of the preceding arguments AND the first word of the following.

  3. Ah – a little similar theme in our poems today I think… This is also a little bit like a cinquains… I like the way it reads, when the intensity follows the lenght of the lines.. you did that very well (and I love the name of the form).

  4. Another message that I wholeheartedly support. Fracking comes to mind! I love the appearance of this and the approach and the name you gave the form as well! I also think your idea to devote a viewpoint to a diamond is a cool idea!

    • Thanks Freya – yes fracking is very real as it is taking place beneath my very house – which has caused wall cracks, doors that won’t shut, breaks in the grout, and in the exterior bricks. Sometimes it wakes me at night (they frack at night so as to try to keep people from noticing). Even though it’s a mile down, my bed vibrates and I find myself bouncing slightly – it isn’t good.

      • Good grief, I really feel for you. It drives me insane that they claim it has no/little/manageable detrimental effect. It was one of my Dad’s pet projects, to lead the way on the anti-fracking debate. I am pleased to see that his organisation is continuing to lobby the government, even now that he is gone.

  5. Yes, it is a fracking shame that steam, wind, solar alternatives, even those sad assed electric cars that only have a 100 mile range can not dent the denizens of the dark world, the oil barons, cabals, villains. We both went with a visual shape as form; probably you could figure out the iambic feet formula for mine too; I just thought it looked cool.

    • Actually your form is fine as it is. I think syllabic feet might be “more natural” for this and actually more up your “free verse” kind of alley. I just took the etheree idea and twisted it with iambic feet count and added a rhyme. I like that rhyme – it sort of glues (solders?) the window panes together. (smiles) Thanks Glenn.

  6. I can’t argue with your thoughts, Gay. Very well thought out. Your poem kind of looks like a drill to me. Being so close to this fracking must be really hard to take. And interesting that they do it at night so they think people won’t notice.

    • After I wrote it, I thought it looked like a drill bit too. They broke one under the house and quit for about 6 months. I was hoping the new one wouldn’t work too, but they’re at it again. 😦

    • Thank you very much. Yes I think the “graphic” quality of the poem could be an additional element in the subject matter depending on layout. I still think it would be a good form for two voices in counterpoint – romantically, angrily, or factually debating.

  7. first…a very striking piece…we all reap what we sow.

    second…even though I find meter in any form a tad annoying…I really liked the way this flowed as well as the visual effect.

    third…the idea of having the diamond “dual” throughout the piece sounds really neat.

  8. The form is lovely, the content extremely unsettling. To think what you are going through in your head thinking about this invasion below you. As if the airspace full of flying machines isn’t unsettling enough these days [we now live near an airport], now we have the other direction to worry about as well. You summed it up so well, but to see that form used for a more pleasant subject would be good.

  9. I was so distracted by the visual beauty of the poem and then the sound of it, that I lost sight of the subject. Had to read it a second time to realise what was going on there. Diamonds is the first thing that came to mind when saw it, thought at first you were talking about diamond mining.

    • Well it was etheree in shape but I wanted it to be more rhythmic not simply syllabic and I wanted to use rhyme. I liked the idea of the one foot rhyme being the solder that holds the windows together. I am eager to try it in two voices – possibly alternating. Thank you.

  10. They and their children will face he consequences along with every one else. The difference is ,they don’t care because all they care about is profit. Like the message and the shape poem.

  11. Interesting style with a beautiful layout effect of chaining diamonds though i am not sure if i can do this without commiting hyphenating end words. Thank you for this challenge at dVerse. Smiles.

  12. the form works excellently… the insistence on iambs is key to keeping a smooth flow. This is where it differs from other shorter, syllable-counting forms like etheree or rictameter. Bravo!

  13. I love the diamond shaped form post Gay ~ I thought this was just a word count but the verses are carefully selected while keeping the theme meaningful ~ This is an eye-opener ~ Thanks for the lovely challenge ~

    • No not a word count at all, Grace – it’s a specific FEET count of iambic (ta-DUM) to fill out the shape. I believe as Luke said, otherwise it would be an etheree or a rictometer but it’s actually a steady beat among the lines with NO hyphenating and with the two foot center line being one rhyme throughout.

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